You know, you had me for a while. You with your tendency to force-feed me shitty cultural standards and overly-romanticized definitions of love and greatness. But I'm onto you. I am sick of you telling me to buy into dizzying displays of machismo and sprezzatura. Of bravado and charisma. I am sick of you insulting the awesome aspects of my womanhood by shoving some of my layers into a bio-hazard waste container marked "Hormonal Madness" and gaslighting me into believing that I'm just a creature wrought by feminine hysteria. You can really derail a good girl with your bush league values, you know that?
So, I decided to come up with my own Rules of En-gauge-ment when it comes to relationships:
- I will gauge his strengths based on how aware he is of his weaknesses.
- I will gauge his confidence based on how comfortable he is with being utterly vulnerable.
- I will gauge his humor based not on the jokes he tells, but his ability to laugh at himself.
- I will gauge his ambition based on how willing he is to fail. Publicly.
- I will gauge his passion not by his fervent, posturing displays but his quiet, consistent prayers.
- I will gauge his command not by his influence over others but by the ease with which he relinquishes control.
- I will gauge his character by what he does for me even when I'm not around or may never come to know.
- I will gauge his true awareness of self by his mindfulness of others.
- I will gauge his wealth not by his earnings but by the bounty of his empathy.
- I will gauge the strength of his hold on me by his willingness to let go.
- I will gauge his love for me by his love for God.
- I will gauge his extraordinariness by the way he handles his own mediocrity.
